When you have a crush, you just want to know if they like you back. It drives you crazy! Instead, learn how to tell if someone likes you and cut the doubt.
More often than not, full-grown adults turn into teenagers when they have a crush. They’ll get friends to bring it up, they’ll go out in group settings, or use flirty texts but in a joking way. All of this just to avoid being obvious. And on top of this, learning how to tell if someone likes you isn’t all that easy when you beat about the bush!
It’s time for everyone to grow up. The truth is that finding out if someone likes you is pretty straightforward if you know how. You don’t have to ask at all, you can just tell.
Hiding your attraction for someone is pretty much impossible. Even if you don’t say much of anything, other signs will. The things you do and say around the person will be done in careful consideration of their presence, even subconsciously.
The confusions of dating
That confusing time when you realize that you actually really like a person is both exciting and downright terrifying. You wonder if they like you back because they’re not asking you out directly. And you’re not completely familiar with the biggest signs someone likes you, so you can’t decode their real intentions.
Of course, you want to try and make a move, because let’s face it, you want to move things along! The problem is, what if they don’t feel the same and you’re left red-faced and embarrassed?
Oh, the joys of dating!
It’s very easy to listen to words and not really focus on the things people are doing. The problem with that is, people lie.
Sorry, it’s true. People also say things to make others feel better. You would be far better not listening to words and instead look more toward the things they can’t help – their physiological signs.
The good news is that when you know what to look for, learning how to tell if someone likes you is actually quite easy.
How to tell if someone likes you without asking them directly
If you want to really know if he or she is digging you as much as you’re digging them, it’s time to get medical.
Physiological signs are things you just can’t help, the things you do instinctively without trying. These are our instincts, and you can’t avoid them happening in certain situations.
For example, when you’re in a situation that scares you, you’re going to automatically react in a set way. You’re probably going to become nervous, your heart will race, you might go hot, you might start shaking, etc. This is your survival mechanism, and it has evolved from the days of the rather hairy cavepeople.
The same can be said for attraction. When we like something or someone, we automatically show physiological signs of attraction.
So how can you tell if someone likes you? Well, you just have to watch out for a few of these signs.
1. They gravitate toward you
Even in a group setting, they’ll gravitate toward you. Think of it this way: when you go out and there’s a mixture of people present, you end up hanging out with people you already know and like, or with new people that you’re starting to befriend.
The same goes for attraction. You’re going to want to gravitate toward that person because you want to spend time with them.
2. They seem nervous for no specific reason
The best way you can learn how to tell if someone likes you is by whether they seem generally nervous or not. When they talk to you, they may seem shy, or awkward. This is not always the case, but if the person gets shy around you, then it means you make them nervous, in a good way.
They may be trying too hard not to mess anything up, or they may be wondering what to say, to get the conversation going because they want to leave a lasting impression on you.
3. They don’t want to be made fun of in front of you
When someone jokes about them *or something embarrassing they do* around you, they’ll try to jokingly derail the friend making the comments.
No one wants to be made fun of in front of someone they’re attracted to, even if it is just a joke. If someone doesn’t legitimately get upset, but jokingly tries to stop the conversation from continuing, then they’re clearly trying to stop their friend from putting them in an awkward position in front of you.
4. They’re often in touch with you
They’ll find a reason to text you, whether it be a joke, plans, or even just emojis. When someone likes you, your presence is always welcome.
However, if you’re not around, they’ll still try to get a hold of you. It could be a simple joke, a cute smiley face, or a “I’m bored, what are you doing?” text. Even if it isn’t something important, they’ll make up a reason just to talk to you. That’s how to tell if someone likes you!
5. They show a keen interest in you
Rather than asking simple questions like anyone else would, they’ll actually try to get to know you more.
Questions about your education, goals, accomplishments, interests, musical taste, and hobbies are a dead giveaway. We mean, really, who wants to know so much about you all at once?
6. The “it’s not a date” move
AKA the fake date. They will legitimately invite you out, even if it’s not an actual “date” at first. It could be them inviting you out to a movie with their friends, or out to eat at a casual place *not a date place*. It could even be them meeting you somewhere, like a local bookstore one of you loves.
None of this classifies as a date, but this is them genuinely feeling out whether there’s chemistry, and working their way to asking you out. This is one of the major points on how to tell if someone likes you.
7. Goody two shoes
They will always be on their best behavior around you. This means all the usual, obnoxious jokes and commentary they may say on a regular basis will be toned down, if not completely avoided, around you.
It isn’t them lying about who they are, it’s just a natural response to someone you’re attracted to. Everyone wants to shine in a good light. The skeletons will come out of the closet eventually, more sooner than later, but for now, it’s how to tell if someone likes you!
8. There’s a slightly split personality going on
It will seem like they’re more open around other people, than they are with you. It sounds contradictory, but if they seem more open around other people, then they obviously don’t care what these people think of them, or they already know these other people.
Meanwhile, with you, things are a bit different.
This person may care what you have to say, because they’re attracted to you, so they’ll be on their best behavior.
9. They notice and do the little things
They will go out of their way to do nice things for you, even small things. For instance, they’ll offer to buy you a drink if you’re hanging out, or they’ll make you something. Maybe they’ll help you set up for an event, if you’re planning one.
Even something as simple as holding a door open can mean so much more coming from someone who’s attracted to you. For sure, they may just be really helpful and polite, but it’s also how to tell if someone likes you.
10. They’re clearly in the infatuation stage
This is also the most reliable they will ever be, so enjoy it. Not to be negative, but realistically, anyone you date may let you down at some point.
No one is perfect, and sometimes, your expectations might be a little too high, setting the stage for disappointment.
It’s a natural thing though, not something to take to heart. That being said, the time before you date, to the first 6 months of dating, will be the time in which you’re both reliable. This person will go out of their way to be there for you, talk to you, spend time with you, help you when you need it, etc.
11. There’s plenty of touchy-feely flirting going on
It may happen right at the beginning, or build up to it, but at some point, there will be a ton of flirting. Some people are great at flirting right from the start, and can pull it off in a non-creepy, non-sleazy way. Others like to get to know you first, and build up a hint or two that you like them back, before they flirt.
Either way, flirting is a dead giveaway that they’ve at least considered your chemistry together, and they’re interested to see where it goes. It could be flirting over text, in person, over the phone, or all the above.
12. They’re on a mission to impress you
One way or another, they will try to impress you. This tends to be a masculine thing, at least that’s what society tells us, but the truth is, women want to impress guys too.
If someone is telling you about their career path, and what they’ve accomplished toward success, then they’re trying to impress you.
They might make a really good drink, or bake a really nice cake, or even show off their intelligence, and general knowledge about a variety of topics. This is certainly up there on how to tell if someone likes you lists.
13. They seek to bond over common ground
You will bond over common ground. It could be music, books, movies, video games, or your love of spaghetti and meatballs. Literally, your common ground can be anything, as long as you’re both passionate about it.
If this person is excited over your mutual love for whatever common ground you have, then there’s a chance they’re attracted to you.
14. They notice everything
Say they’re the quiet type, they will still laugh at your antics, and sit somewhere close to you at social events. There are some super shy people out there: introverts, people with low self-esteem, or even just people who like to observe others more than they like to get involved.
If the person is attracted to you, but they’re really quiet, chances are, they’ll make up for it by sitting somewhere near you, if not right next to you, and observe your answers to the dynamic at the event.
They’ll notice everything about you and what’s going on, because they’re so invested in the moment.
15. Listen to the nosey people
Usually, someone will point this person’s behavior out to you, wanting to know what your stance is on the whole situation *they’re being nosey, aren’t they?*.
But then again, sometimes the best way to know if someone likes you or not is to just wait for someone else to point it out. It always happens – people notice when there’s a special dynamic forming on the horizon.
If they point it out, and they claim you’re an object of someone’s affection, then listen to them!
16. They smile a lot around you
It’s hard to be sad and frown around someone you really like. You’re automatically going to smile, because you feel joy, and your face simply can’t help itself! In terms of how to tell if someone likes you, a constant smile is a pretty good measure.
17. They often make eye contact or you notice them staring when you’re not looking
Eye contact is a definite sign of attraction, and if you notice that the guy or girl you’ve got your eye on literally has their eye on you, especially when they think you’re not looking, you can pretty much put it down as a definite ‘yes.’
18. Or, they can’t look at you
Confusing, right? Some people are a little shy naturally, or they might suddenly become shy around the people they like.
If you’re noticing that he or she looks at you and then quickly looks away, perhaps like they’ve been caught doing something they shouldn’t, that’s how to tell if someone likes you! But, of course, it depends on the person and the way they react to what is a slightly embarrassing situation.
19. They display open body language … or it might be closed
Yet another completely confusing contradiction is the subject of body language. Generally speaking, if someone likes you and wants you to know about it, their body language will be open and not at all defensive.
This could mean that their arms are by their sides, and not over their body, their shoulders are where they should be and not hunched up out of stress, and they look generally quite relaxed around you.
On the flip side, some people *shy types again* may actually display very closed body language around you for no real reason; this means they may cross their arms over their body as the main example.
The best way to figure it out is to see if they do the same thing with anyone else and that should give you your answer.
20. Their body is angled toward you
We tend to unknowingly lean towards the things we like, so if you’re noticing that his or her body is angled towards you, and not away from you, that’s a pretty clear sign too.
Even if someone is showing closed body language out of shyness, they will probably still lean into you a little. This won’t be a move that looks forced, it will also be quite subtle, but it’s definitely there.
21. Their cheeks are flushed
One of the clearest ways on how to tell if someone likes you is flushed cheeks. It’s not particularly hot, but they’re certainly going a little pink!
The reason for this is thought to be the release of adrenaline, which causes an increase in blood flow. As a result, you get that pink tinge on your cheeks!
22. They might be shaking slightly
Isn’t it great when your mere presence causes someone to lose all control and start shaking a little! Take it as a compliment, because if you see someone with flushed cheeks who has the slight shakes, it’s a very clear sign that they’re nervous and crushing on you!
23. They stumble over their words
If someone is stumbling over their words around you and they normally don’t have an issue with it, it’s a clear sign you either terrify them or they like you!
Hopefully, it’s the latter, but it’s a good indicator on how to tell if someone likes you.
24. They fidget a lot
Another common sign someone likes you is fidgeting. This can be messing with their hair, touching their neck, tugging on their lip, pulling on their sleeves; it can basically be any type of fidgeting motion that they wouldn’t normally do.
25. Their pupils dilate
Okay, you’re going to have to look pretty closely to see if this is happening, but when we like someone, our pupils get larger in size.
This can also be a reaction to light, so if you’re in a pretty dark environment, don’t take this is as a certain sign, but if it’s in conjunction with other signs and it’s a normal lighting kind of situation, you’re in there!
26. They mirror your posture
The same kind of thing as leaning into you, when we like someone, we tend to mirror their posture and movements to a small degree.
If he or she is standing in a similar way to you, that could be a clear sign on how to tell if someone likes you.
27. They have a strong posture
This is more likely to be a man, but it can sometimes be a woman too. In this case, the posture is strong, because they’re trying to impress you with their strength, and in this case, manliness. A woman could be doing it to exude confidence.
28. Their heart is beating faster
Again, pretty difficult to identify unless you get very close, but if someone likes you, their heart is likely to beat a little faster when you’re around. Look at their neck if you get the chance, can you visibly see their pulse? You might also notice they’re a little breathless as a result.
29. They might be a little hot or sweaty
Attractive, right? If you’re noticing that they seem a little hotter than is necessary, it could be a clear sign that they’re feeling hot under the collar due to your presence in the room!
30. They’re instinctively protective over you
Exhibiting protective behavior is another sign that someone likes you, because we tend to want to protect those we care about.
This could be sticking up for you verbally, either when you’re around or not around, or it could be stepping into a fight. Either way, it’s a good sign for how to tell if someone likes you.
How many signs can you identify?
Remember, just one or two signs doesn’t really tell you a huge amount, but more than three, especially when they don’t do it in anyone else’s presence and you’ve got a very clear answer coming your way!
For sure, asking if they like you directly may lead to some awkwardness, but there are other ways to find out if someone likes you.
Something as simple as gravitating toward you, talking to you, and going out of their way to do nice things for you, are dead giveaways. If they actively try to impress you, find common ground, and be on their best behavior, then you should already know.
After all, when someone likes you, they can’t hide it – they’re programmed to do something about it, even if they do only show as tiny hints.
So the next time you’re wondering how to tell if someone likes you, look out for the signs! If you like them back, don’t question or ask, just go with the flow of things, and watch your story develop naturally.